Friday, August 18, 2006

Get this man a towel. I think he's foaming at the mouth.

It looks like someone with a bit of a screw loose found my post on Jesus appearing on the tail of a shrimp and left a lengthy repy. It was so.... er..... unique, that I felt it deserved its own post:
Dear Jesus Believers; Jesus is not a shrimp! Jesus is already among you. Somewhere on Earth, a puzzle for you to go find him. Jesus Christ is not a shrimp, but, he is the Son of God. He may already have believers among him, already. In secret, kind of - to safty sake, in some sort of way. If you find Jesus Christ, good for you. You shall be saved. Go find him. He will claim he is the Messiah. He will be where they jail him, because, he claims he is the Messiah. He arrived in 2002. Now, where do they jail people who claim are The Messiah? China? Anyway, it would be a place where they don't believe that Jesus Christ is the Messiah , anyway. Also, maybe Iraq? We all know that one. Maybe he is in a place where they don't believe in Jesus Christ returning as the Messiah. Maybe he is in Bagdad? Go look worldwide, and go find the one who calls himself the Messiah and he can preform miracles, too. Remember, Sedna, former moon of Jupiter as LO, is predicted to land in Mexico and Texas and part of it in the Ocean, there. Dulce, Taos, and Los Alamos own Sedna, as they are Aliens, Androids, Robots, and Serpents coming to INVADE EARTH, as it was, first theirs, to begin with long ago. Get ready, somewhere inbetween December of 2006 and March of 2007 Sedna lands on Earth to invade it. Then, in the meantime, War begins on Earth. Like a War of the Worlds kind of thing. Then, in 2012, Nibiru, 4 times larger than Earth, our 10th planet, lands in Italy, killing the leader of the 666, there - The Pope, or somebody as ANTI-CHRIST. The Alps is where the Pope hides, underground chambers and tunnels and he takes 100 office people with him, they die, too. DO NOT BUY INTO SEDNA'S AND NIBIRU'S GAME! THEY ARE THE DEVIL KIND. Go find Jesus Christ, the one who calls himself, The Messiah and he can preform miracles. He could be anywhere, right now. We don't exactly know what HE might look like, nowdays, but, he does have dark skin and dark hair and he is big boned and about 6' or more. If you can tell an ARIES, Jesus was born under the sign of the Ram in the Aries Constellation in April if you go look up past star contellations at that time and the Maji were from Persia, one was an astromoner, one was an astrologer, and one was philosopher. They could have been a 3 generation group, son, father and grandfather as they were all studying the same thing in Persia.

If you are a CHRISTIAN, you will be BARCODE TATTOOED by Chinese Mongolian Terrorists as soon as a flood comes and floods the White House from the East, from a Tsunami, from Canary Island Volcano, erupting from Nibiru's landing in Italy. Or sooner from Sedna's arrival into New Mexico beaches.

If you are under the ANTI-CHRIST rule, such as, if you are a Catholic under the Pope, then, you will probably be enslaved, taken, or whatever, by THE INVADERS OF SEDNA AND NIBIRU.

REMEMBER, NIBIRU IS OUR 10 PLANET, LUCIFER'S HOME BASE PLANET, IRAQ IS LUCIFER'S OTHER HOME BASE, EITHER IN BABYLON, ERIDU, OR BENEATH PERSIAN GULF, THEY ARE ALL UNDERGROUND, UNDERWORLD BASES OF THE DRAGON.

THE DRAGON REALLY EXISTS! HE LIVES IN THE CAPTIAL CITY, SHAMBHALLA, AGHARTA, IN A GIANT, BIGGER THAN ALL THE REST, PYRAMID, SURROUDED IN A LIQUID, NOT WATER. THE DRAGON CALLED THE KER'SERAT DRAGON IS THE LEADER. DRAGONS REALLY DO EXIST. IT IS JUST THAT THEY ARE NOT ALLOWED TO BE SHOWN TO THE PUBLIC, YET! HAVE YOU EVER HEARD OF THE WINGED SERPENTS? THE DRACONIANS? SOME OF THE SPECIES ON SEDNA ARE MALE WITH TWO HORNS ON THEIR HEAD. FEMALE ARE THE ONE WHO HAVE WINGS.

BUT, THE KER'SERAT DRAGON IS OVER 3O,000 YEARS OLD AND HE HAS A WINGSPAN AND SCALES AND HE IS A SUPER BEING, DOWN THERE IN THE UNDERWORLD, AS YOU ONE CALLS IT, HELL!

READ BIBLE, ALL OF IT, IF YOU CAN'T AND WON'T, THEN, YOU WON'T CATCH ON, VERY FAST.

THE KER'SERAT DRAGON IS A 666, DEVIL.

WHAT SIDE ARE YOU ON? CHRISTIAN OR ANTI-CHRIST?

DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE REAL STARGATES, OR WHAT YOU CALL WORMHOLES IN BURMUDA TRIANGLE, GOBI DESERT, GIZA PYRAMID, ETC.? IT IS WHERE YOU CAN GO TO ANOTHER PLANET IN ABOUT 4 MINUTES, AT LIGHT SPEED. SOMETIMES YOU WILL NOT RETURN, DUE TO CARELESSNESS IN THE BURMUDA TRIANGLE, IF YOU DON'T KNOW HOW TO DIAL HOME AFTER YOU GET THERE. THERE ARE DIVICES AT THE STARGATES THAT YOU USE.

THE TIME IS GETTING CLOSER TO THE END TIMES. 2000 YRS AGO JESUS SAID, "I SHALL RETURN 2000 YEARS AFTER MY DEATH." HE DID, ALREADY. GO FIND JESUS CHRIST. LOOK HARD! WHEN AND IF YOU FIND HIM, ASK HIM IF YOU CAN JOIN HIM AND BE HIS FOLLOWER. GOOD LUCK.
WOW! Did you catch all that?

I think this is one of the best delusional rants I've ever had the pleasure of reading! I especially liked the barcode tattoos by the Chineese Mongolian Terrorists. And Satan (who is apparently in cahoots with a dragon) having underground layers on Sedna (which isn't, for the record, a moon of Jupiter). But apparently Sedna will come to life and conquer us all with the help of Nibiru (that 10th planet that no one seems to be able to find) any time now. And stargates in the Bermuda triangle? Well, gee. That proves it: Grade A nuttery.

15 comments:

Seven Star Hand said...

Cute...

RE:"ASK HIM IF YOU CAN JOIN HIM AND BE HIS FOLLOWER. GOOD LUCK."

Sorry, Jesus Christ is in Santa's workshop with the other elves. By the way, hero-worship is folly and delusion. Follow the Doctrine of Two Spirits instead.

Peace...

gregory said...

Well, at least it's falsifiable.

Butch said...

Awesome! But really, it’s only more delusional than the typical theology because we’re used to hearing the typical stuff.

Anonymous said...

Quite sad really.

TheBrummell said...

I love it! Most delusional rants sacrifice boring, rigid rules like "grammar" and "spelling" and "punctuation" because those are obviously extraneous, and tools of the patriarchy, too.

This is surprisingly lucid, even if it is completely insane. The swtich from mostly standard-writing to ALL CAPS 2/3 of the way through is entertaining. I also like the fact it (parts of it) is falsifiable - everybody pay special attention between December 2006 and March 2007!

Keerax said...

I found Jesus! I did! He's right over... oh wait damn. It's just Waldo.

John said...

I think my favourite snippet would have to be, "Sedna's arrival into New Mexico beaches." All those New Mexico surfers better watch out!

The Science Pundit said...

This reminds me of the Book of Revelations--the difference being that Revelations is a 2000 year old delusional rant. Great stuff!

Anonymous said...

was this guy serious??

i thought this was a joke...





well... maybe its and unintentional one

Daniel said...

If I can figure out a great dangerous enemy outside of me, then I do not need to fight an enemy within...

The way I see it, it's not about choosing from paths "out there", but instead make personal decisions that may improve our beings, allow us to become more peaceful, passionate, tolerant, productive, loving, etc...

Paper Hand said...

So, Nibiru is "four times the size of Earth", yet when it "lands in Italy" it will only kill the Pope? Pretty small effect for something bigger than the Earth ... :-)

And, wait, if Jesus said he'd return 2,000 years after his death, then wouldn't we still have to wait a while? He's generally thought to have died somewhere around the year 30 AD ...

Kay said...

I thought it was pretty tongue in cheek. :o

Daniel said...

If I can figure out a great dangerous enemy outside of me, then I do not need to fight an enemy within...

The way I see it, it's not about choosing from paths "out there", but instead make personal decisions that may improve our beings, allow us to become more peaceful, passionate, tolerant, productive, loving, etc...

Seven Star Hand said...

Cute...

RE:"ASK HIM IF YOU CAN JOIN HIM AND BE HIS FOLLOWER. GOOD LUCK."

Sorry, Jesus Christ is in Santa's workshop with the other elves. By the way, hero-worship is folly and delusion. Follow the Doctrine of Two Spirits instead.

Peace...

Butch said...

Awesome! But really, it’s only more delusional than the typical theology because we’re used to hearing the typical stuff.